Wraith{tyme} :
........Bashes the Discussion GONG!!!!......

BOLT UPRIGHT says to Wraith{tyme}:
wow ...this is important

Wraith{tyme} :
Welcome to The Edge's Discussion. The topic for tonight's Discussion is Dominants, what makes a good One/bad one?

Brutal could/would be a good trait but abusive would definitely be a bad trait for One.
A Dominant that hurts could/would be heaven for some subs, but One that actually harms, not so nice.
A dominant that humiliates their sub could be seen by some as a horribly selfish person, to do such a thing to their sub, that is unless their sub is totally turned on by public humiliation.
All of these subtle and not so subtle differences are not evident to the vanilla bystander but to Us/us, they are very clear.

tyme :
shi is on her way

Demon says to bella {t}:
It's beautiful My pet, I approve! *finding a unoccupied chair, walking toward it with you behind Me on the leash, sitting down comfortably and patting My lap, eyes into yours*

bella {t} says to Demon:
merci Papa ~grins wide.. following You.. slides onto Your lap n curls up for the discussion~

Wraith{tyme} :
now don't all type at once..*L*...what makes a good Dom in your eyes ?

Demon says to Wraith{tyme}:
If I may state the obvious here, what differentiates a good Dom from a bad one is essentially _intent_.

tyme says to bella {t}:
hopes you will throw in your two cents too beauty *w*

Smooth Edge says to Wraith{tyme}:
A 19 1/2 inch....NEvermind

Wraith{tyme} says to Demon:
very true..in that case..how would a subbie determine the Doms intents ?

BOLT UPRIGHT says to Smooth Edge:
You been peekin In my garage ?

Neptune says to Wraith{tyme}:
as you already eluded it's relative and depends on the sub so I would say one aspect is a good Dom picks a sub campatible with his nature

( bella {t} says to tyme:
i have about $4 worth tonight... ~soft laff~

viscus :
some subs like humiliation not one of them mind You would uhm sock someone but some do

Wraith{tyme} says to Smooth Edge:
you use that one so much it has to have worn down at least an inch or two..*G*

tyme says to Smooth Edge:
i know You have more than that 19 1/2 inch cock going for You Sir.....You forget, muse and i talk *w*

Demon says to bella {t}:
*pulling you in close as you curl up on Me, left hand at the base of your neck again but this time playing with your hair lowly, gently, right hand resting on your right thigh, near that place of warm and moistness*

Smooth Edge says to Wraith{tyme}:
*quickly measures* Whew...major erosion

BOLT UPRIGHT says to Wraith{tyme}:
If she knows her ultimate good is his desire

{M}oxie :
Enters the room...

Wraith{tyme} says to Neptune:
compatability and similar desires are very important

Smooth Edge says to tyme:
True...it's 19 3/4 but I don't like to make the other Doms feel small

Wraith{tyme} says to Smooth Edge:
maybe it's just cold there

Demon says to Wraith{tyme}:
she can't, until she's experienced Him. Which is where trut becomes paramount. And trust is really an act of faith.

dark muse says to Wraith{tyme}:
One who always aspires to have His submissives best interest at heart. *s*

BOLT UPRIGHT says to Smooth Edge:
My sawhorses just as big as yours lol

{M}oxie :
oh my god covers my ears

Demon says to Wraith{tyme}:
Some would say a roll of the dice.

bella {t} says to Wraith{tyme}:
to me.. a good Dom will nurture His submissive... help her to grow... to be the best that she can be

Smooth Edge says to Wraith{tyme}:
Intersting popint at the end of Your introduction. Many things those of us in the lifestyle realize are lost on those with little knowledge of it. As with many things, ignorance does not stop them from judging.

tyme says to Neptune:
that is definitely true Sir..... one but would be though...... if you have a girl calling herself a sub when actually she is dealing with issues that cause her to want to be hurt, because she thinks so little of herself, then, the abuser calling themself a Dom/me could take advantage of that one

{M}oxie :
hi to all,,,smiles

Wraith{tyme} says to Demon:
Hmmm..what if his intentions are bad..if he doesn'r follow protocol what are the subs options

Demon says to Wraith{tyme}:
But once she's experienced Him, she'll likely be able to tell intent. Character tends to shine true, except where gifted con artists are concerned.

rose says to Wraith{tyme}:
quirks head perhap intent is hard because Some will pertend

Smooth Edge says to BOLT UPRIGHT:
And tools?

bella {t} says to Demon:
~mewling quietly before pressing a soft kiss to Your cheek~

oncebitten2xshi{Shikan} :
Enters the room...

Neptune says to tyme:
again a good reason to choose wisely and to be sure

Smooth Edge says to dark muse:
*s* Nah

tyme says to {M}oxie:
evening and welcome to Discussion night in The Edge

{M}oxie says to oncebitten2xshi{Shik:
g'evening,,,smiles

dark muse says to Demon:
It does indeed *s*

Wraith{tyme} says to rose:
Aye there are wannabes and pretenders wandering around....most on the internet..in r/t it's quite tough to hide Ones lack of knowledge and or bad habits

Wraith{tyme} swats oncebitten2xshi{Shik 's ass with a firm hand and says:
you're late

dark muse says to oncebitten2xshi{Shik:
shibits *hugs*

bella {t} says to {M}oxie:
hello Sir ~hugs~

{M}oxie says to tyme:
thanks,,,good to be here ,,,smiles

bella {t} says to oncebitten2xshi{Shik:
hey pretty shi ~hugs~

BOLT UPRIGHT says to Smooth Edge:
My tape measures are metric and my wrenches chrome

Demon says to bella {t}:
8settling in your you a lovely warmheft in My lap, content even if I don't say another word tonight*

Wraith{tyme} says to {M}oxie:
Evening

dark muse says to Smooth Edge:
*smiles up*

~ashandra~ says to {M}oxie:
Evening Sir

{M}oxie says to bella {t}:
hugs back,,,good to see you ,,,smiles

Neptune says to Wraith{tyme}:
it wouldn't be shi if she were on time

dark muse says to Smooth Edge:
You always have my best interest at heart..

Demon says to {M}oxie:
Evening

{M}oxie says to Wraith{tyme}:
nice to see you,,,smiles

viscus :
evening shi...warm smile

Demon says to oncebitten2xshi{Shik:
Evening. *S*

oncebitten2xshi{Shikan} :
*wiggles fingers in a wave so as to not interrupt the good chat* evening A/all

Neptune says to oncebitten2xshi{Shik:
*hugs* hiya shi

{M}oxie says to ~ashandra~:
great to see you ash,,,smiles

Smooth Edge says to Wraith{tyme}:
Good Doms exercise control over their submissives about those things that are meaningful to them. What methods they use vary according to His methods and the nature of His sub, Any Dom who has to be cruel or abusive to establish or exercise control is weak.

{M}oxie says to Demon:
howdy,,,,smiles

rose says to Wraith{tyme}:
nods softly..

Wraith{tyme} says to Smooth Edge:
well said Sir

oncebitten2xshi{Shikan} says to Wraith{tyme}:
of course i am *g*

tyme :
i think the communication, negotiations, talk talk and more talk comes in handy prior to a commitment/collar, now for just a scene one off, i don't think much of One's intent would be clear

{M}oxie :
finds a seat relax ,,,,,,sipping on coffee

Wraith{tyme} softly caresses tyme 's cheek with a warm palm:
Wwe talked talked talked...and yes..talked..a grewat deal before Oour first scene..*S*

tyme says to Demon:
hopes You will continue to contribute *s*

bella {t} says to Smooth Edge:
well said Sir ~nods~

Demon says to Smooth Edge:
Weak, yes. And I would add not really a Dom at all.

Neptune says to tyme:
so no velcro collars

bella {t} says to Demon:
but i love to hear You... ~s~

Demon says to Wraith{tyme}:
If I can keep up with the flow, yes, but there's no guarantee that state of affairs will obtain. *L*

Demon says to bella {t}:
I know you do My pet. But that can be fixed by some phone time after the discussion wraps up. *G*

tyme says to Smooth Edge:
too true Sir, sadly too often here in VT the insecure, weak, depression-suffering ones try to get what they want here, at least in RT it is a bit easier to tell weak or strong

bella {t} says to Demon:
~dreamy smiles~ i would very much enjoy that... thank You ~s~

Wraith{tyme} :
A Dominant that takes the time to get to know the submissive, their wants and needs to find out if T/they both share similar likes and dislikes and limitations too, has the first and most important part of a good Dominant.
The second part of a good Dom/me is respect. Respect for themselves and respect for the submissive of their desire.
Third part that makes a good Dominant, They want to learn everything they can about the submissive of their desire and as well, They want to share with the sub about who They are and what They want.
Needless to say, a good Dominant is One who is flexible in the role and can use Their Imagination and experience to tailor the power exchange to whichever sub They choose to handle. This is where it becomes known that not all Dominants are right for all subs.
This is why all this communication about likes and dislikes is critical, sometimes adnausem it seems but it can also be the best part, especially when compatibility is found.

Smooth Edge says to tyme:
But if it weren't easy for the insecure and weak you refer to to get what they want, what purpose would there be for chatro? *G*

tyme says to Neptune:
i think that is why all that priliminary communication is so important, to make sure Tthey are compatible before even thinking of collars

Wraith{tyme} says to Smooth Edge:
every Village needs a cesspit..*G*

Demon says to tyme:
I truly think that very many who claim to be Dom or sub v/t are only Tops and botoms, not reallu interested in D/s as a Lifestyle but more in bedroom games.

viscus :
I think clear limits have to be specified...

Demon says to tyme:
There's absolutely _nothing_ wrong with that, but one should not then call oneself Dom or sub.

Wraith{tyme} says to viscus:
hard and soft limits help define the relationship..*Nods*

Demon says to bella {t}:
*grinning at you* Oddly enough you aren't the only one who would enjoy phone. Imagine that! *eyes sparkling*

{M}oxie :
Enters the room...

viscus says to Demon:
are You saying that only those that live the lifestyle r/t can say that?

dark muse says to Demon:
So you're only a real Dom or submissive if it's r/t ?

Neptune says to viscus:
as well as wants and needs

tyme says to Smooth Edge:
*l* hadn't thought of that Sir *l*

{M}oxie :
ouch rubs my fanny after been booted

~ashandra~ :
the one thing i first look for is if The Dom is interested in me.....that is rare. to never ask questions etc. i ask. because i want to know. i would think the opposite would be the same

Smooth Edge says to Wraith{tyme}:
Whether this is Your own wisdom or You read it and were percpetive enough to realize its wisdom, You risk losing Your reputation by posting it. *G*

Smooth Edge says to Wraith{tyme}:
Valid point

bella {t} says to Demon:
~grinning~ then it will be a good night for us both...

Demon says to Wraith{tyme}:
I would also add that a good Dominant will take His submissives where they want to go, especially ease them into things they want to try but fear a little. A good Dominant makes His submissives grow.

Wraith{tyme} says to Smooth Edge:
*Whispers...tyme wrote it up for Me..seems I need to make her do things for Me..*S*

tyme says to Demon:
while i mostly agree, tops and bottoms are not so bad, but the ones to worry about are the actual fakes whose intent is to actually cause harm and use people

Smooth Edge says to Demon:
That is very true..and fine..as long as they don't claim what they do is lving the life..and try to convince others of it

Demon says to viscus:
Not at all no, I did say "many". not "most" nor "all".

viscus says to Demon:
ok... chuckles retracts claws

Demon says to dark muse:
As for viscus, don;t put words in My mouth. *chuckles*

Smooth Edge says to ~ashandra~:
That's wose ash. Any DOm that won't answer a question is worried about something.

Smooth Edge says to Wraith{tyme}:
*L* Better

~sherry~ :
goodnight A/all..has to get to r/t

Neptune says to viscus:
put on your gun's safety

Wraith{tyme} says to ~ashandra~:
He should want to know alot about you..in order to determine how to use you best

tyme says to Wraith{tyme}:
a bad Dom/me to me is a tyrant, i mean in general terms, treats all as though they own them, are better than, and there are those other bad Dom/mes that are insecure and depressed and so they take to a dungeon or bdsm chat room to compensate for their lack of control and their miserable lives.... bad Dom/me *s*

Wraith{tyme} says to ~sherry~:
be well sherry..*S*

~sherry~ :
vanishes over the edge...

viscus says to Neptune:
the guns are just for show to scare boys that come around LOL

Demon says to tyme:
Absolutely, one should NOT confuse "wannabes" with Tops or bottoms. Those can be as genuine as Doms and subs.

tyme says to Demon:
true enough

Demon says to Smooth Edge:
Precisely My point, yes.

bella {t} says to ~ashandra~:
good point ash.. ~s~

Wraith{tyme} says to tyme:
good point My pet

Neptune says to viscus:
If I recal the shotgun is loaded *g*

Demon says to Neptune:
No worries, I own a bullet proof vest. *BOL*

Demon says to ~sherry~:
Goodnight ~sherry~, be well.

Smooth Edge says to tyme:
Sdaly that os endemic to the lifestyle tyme. We will always have to deal with those who use the lifestyle to deal with their own insecurities..and cause much ahrm to others in doing so.

bella {t} says to Demon:
being a top or bottom is fine.. and it's good to be what one wants to be... or rather.. what one is. but i agree.. don't call yourself a Dom or a sub because you are into kinky fuckery...

{M}oxie says to bella {t}:
i agree ash through out a good point a veaw

Neptune says to Demon:
I would say she's harmless but my nose would grow

viscus says to Demon:
have never done this real time...but online have sort of been both, Dom and sub, even a stint as a gorean slave...and through those experiences I have learned about who I truly a as a person and where I best fit in and what my needs and desires are...not sure what I am but I am more submissive than anything

Smooth Edge says to Wraith{tyme}:
I think bad typists are good Doms

tyme says to ~ashandra~:
totally agrees ashandra, if a Dom/me wasn't asking me questions about myself, wants, needs and all that, then that would be a huge red flag to me, i would be gone in a flash

Demon says to bella {t}:
*smiles at you*

Wraith{tyme} says to bella {t}:
"kinky fuckery."..great phrase

viscus says to Neptune:
they all are, a gun is useless unloaded ...nodding

Demon says to Neptune:
*chuckles* Can't have that.

Smooth Edge says to viscus:
It is a good way to explore..find out what is right for you...and who you are

Wraith{tyme} says to Smooth Edge:
Aye..We are perfect exmanples of that Brother

BOLT UPRIGHT :
listens and wears out my pencil

Neptune says to viscus:
exploration is a good thing *s*

bella {t} says to Smooth Edge:
~laffin @ bad typists~

Smooth Edge says to Wraith{tyme}:
My thought exactly

Demon says to viscus:
I agree there is much to be gleaned v/t about our true selves. It's a very good place for that, so long as we can separate the wheat from the chaff.

Wraith{tyme} says to Smooth Edge:
our minds simply go faster than out fingers..*Nods*

bella {t} says to Wraith{tyme}:
i think i borrowed that from 50 Shades ~laff~

Demon says to bella {t}:
There's bad typists _HERE_ *eyes wide* Truly pet, I am shocked. *snickers,knowing I'm the first culprit*

viscus says to Demon:
that takes true talent and the ability to wait and feel someone out...

Smooth Edge says to Wraith{tyme}:
My toes travel at the right speed.If I could only toe type

viscus says to Demon:
I can dominate but that does not make me a dominate it does nothing for me...

bella {t} says to Demon:
~soft laff~ yes.. there seems to be a lot of typonese in here .. You included...

tyme says to Smooth Edge:
and sadly i think they also come in the sub version too, insecure comes in all roles sadly

tyme says to oncebitten2xshi{Shik:
are you here sexy???

Smooth Edge says to tyme:
True

Wraith{tyme} says to Smooth Edge:
you have names your next great challenge...toe typing

Smooth Edge says to tyme:
she is always here sexy

Demon says to bella {t}:
*enjoying the closeness, fingers of My left hand twirling your silken golden curls, My right hand slowly caressing your right inner thigh back and forth*

BOLT UPRIGHT :
I know I have to respect boundaries of a submissive ...trampling them to me is "bad Dom" ..

bella {t} :
a good Dom must be able to make my toes curl.. heh

Smooth Edge says to Wraith{tyme}:
My last great challenge was counting to 5 backwards..and I'm almost there

Demon says to viscus:
I agree. Though once you hone your "talents", you can usually feel people out much quicker. But yes, it IS a slow and laborious process at first.

dark muse says to bella {t}:
totally agree with that one ..*s*

viscus :
I think a good Dom, or a true Dom can tell by the subtle nuances of His/Her sub when they have had enough and when not to push because He/She is always watching taking care not to go to far too fast

Neptune says to bella {t}:
now really sums it up

Wraith{tyme} says to Smooth Edge:
everytime I try that I fall asleep..wierd huh

Smooth Edge says to bella {t}:
*grabs your big toe and bends it*

bella {t} says to Demon:
~reaching up to gently scratch Your beard as Your hands soothe me~

oncebitten2xshi{Shikan} says to tyme:
yes here although admittedly a touch brain dead

Smooth Edge says to dark muse:
your toe too

BOLT UPRIGHT :
I thought it was "make her wet with a single glance " ?

Demon says to bella {t}:
*keeping My mouth shut about toe curling, humming a little ditty*

dark muse says to Smooth Edge:
*laughs*

Smooth Edge says to Wraith{tyme}:
Even without sheep?

Wraith{tyme} :
Bad Dom/mes can usually be recognized by their lack of respect for everyone and are generally seen hitting on every submissive, collared or not.
So are the personality traits the most important traits of a good Dominant? Or are the skills the most important for a Dom/me to have?
In no particular order, personality traits:
understanding, communication, loving, self-controlled, devoted, love of learning new things, open-minded, accepting, honest and trustworthy. And of course the good submissive should have similar personality traits.
Or are the skills a Dom/me has more important? Skilled at whatever kinks are needed in the moment, for the pleasure of both Self and submissive?

bella {t} says to dark muse:
you would.. you dlw ~smooch~

Demon says to BOLT UPRIGHT:
Agreed, the very first "rule" is "Respect limits"

Neptune says to Demon:
I find the feeling out a rewarding endeavor and never laboreous

bella {t} says to Neptune:
sure does ~wink~

dark muse says to bella {t}:
*grins and smooches*

ben :
Enters the room...

Wraith{tyme} says to Neptune:
I concur

Demon says to viscus:
However, that does not obviate the need for a safeword./gesture. One should ALWAYS have those.

Wraith{tyme} says to ben:
hello ben

bella {t} says to Smooth Edge:
~squeals~ not like THAT !

Smooth Edge says to Wraith{tyme}:
The character rtraits define the Dom...the skills just allow Him to perform better

tyme says to BOLT UPRIGHT:
totally agrees Sir, lack of respect is definitely a bad sign

Wraith{tyme} says to Demon:
safeword is a contractual requirement..*S*

~ashandra~ :
i think the personalities traits are very important. shows what kind of Man He is...to be able to play nice with Others

BOLT UPRIGHT :
it is very important to have a SafeWord but even more important not to forget it

Smooth Edge says to bella {t}:
I tend to be literal

Wraith{tyme} says to Smooth Edge:
Agreed..One can always learn the skills

viscus says to Demon:
nods lots..but a Good Dom will set those limits ahead of time because He/She wants to insure the trust and safety of what He/She cares for

Demon says to Wraith{tyme}:
NO question, personality traits come first, foremost, always. Skills can be acquirred much more easily than those, if they are lacking.

oncebitten2xshi{Shikan} :
kink or skilss can be learned......personality traits are either there or they arent

BOLT UPRIGHT :
I know that sounds ridiculous for getting the SafeWord… But my girl did one time so I gave her one lash too many

Wraith{tyme} says to Demon:
I didn't know how to light a girl on fire and not burn her up when I started this..now I do..*S*

tyme says to oncebitten2xshi{Shik:
tell me shi, what bad dominant quality do you think is the worst?

{M}oxie says to Wraith{tyme}:
yes ,,,safe word is great

Demon says to Neptune:
When you start new and don;t yet know yourself, it can and often IS laborious. Precisely because you know nothing yet. It's not just abot learning the other, it's also about learning _you_

bella {t} says to Demon:
yes.. well said Love ~smiling~ traits cannot be learned.....

Smooth Edge says to dark muse:
your safeword is "more" *nods*

viscus says to Wraith{tyme}:
cracks up...and hides the matches

ben :
vanishes over the edge...

oncebitten2xshi{Shikan} says to tyme:
Deceit

{M}oxie says to Smooth Edge:
laughs at your post to dark muse

Wraith{tyme} says to {M}oxie:
best part is to take the sub right up to the point where they think they should use the word..but aren't sure yet..then you know you're doing it right..*S*

Demon says to Wraith{tyme}:
yes well, having asked a lawyer friend I can tell You that there is NO jurisprudence covering Lifestyle Contracts. "Requirement" becomes a rather tenuous word then.

BOLT UPRIGHT says to Wraith{tyme}:
The rule of thumb is 11 lashes..actually the origin of the expression rule of thumb was how big the rod was you could beat your family with

Smooth Edge says to Demon:
Offer..acceptance..consideration..required in all contracts..Just guessing *G*

Wraith{tyme} says to Demon:
ne need for lawyers in BDSM..there's enough torture to go around already..*G*

{M}oxie says to Wraith{tyme}:
yes,,,,smiles

oncebitten2xshi{Shikan} says to Wraith{tyme}:
*laughs*

Smooth Edge says to Wraith{tyme}:
Damn lawyers!!!

bella {t} says to Wraith{tyme}:
~laffin hard and looks over at SE~

dark muse says to Smooth Edge:
greedy muse...

Neptune says to Smooth Edge:
doubts if that's a guess

Smooth Edge says to bella {t}:
How hard are you laughing?

{M}oxie :
sipping on the last drops of coffee

Wraith{tyme} says to bella {t}:
where is your 4.5 pages of stuff ?

Smooth Edge says to dark muse:
erotically greedy

bella {t} says to Smooth Edge:
it was more a delightful giggle Sir...

viscus says to Neptune:
bounces on Your lap because You need a good bouncing

Demon says to Smooth Edge:
All Lifestyle contracts are utterly meaningless in the eyes of the law. I find them useless. Which does not mean I don;t value the points therein, just that writing them down helps nothing.

Smooth Edge says to Neptune:
a semi-educated guess

bella {t} says to Wraith{tyme}:
did i say pages? i meant words....

Neptune says to viscus:
just don't break anything

Smooth Edge says to bella {t}:
lauughs and shakes MY head...bella

tyme says to oncebitten2xshi{Shik:
oh that one is for sure, sadly, more so online i think it is bad trait too many of us have had to deal with..... and that one, deceit is too often found in both Dom/mes and subs

bella {t} says to Smooth Edge:
~bright smile~

viscus says to Demon:
as a diligent not taker I will have to disagree there...sometimes wirting things out helps memory and it can inforce a point that needs to be made, it simplifies things and can bring up discussions that might be important

Neptune says to bella {t}:
"curls my toes" is only 3 words

Smooth Edge says to Demon:
True, they are not legal in the sense they will be upheld by a court, but they should be meaningful to the Dom and the sub and the trems arrived at with much care.

Wraith{tyme} says to oncebitten2xshi{Shik:
deciet means no trust AND no respect..very bad for maybe dom

Demon says to viscus:
I didn't say I didn't take notes. Just that formal contracts are pointless.

tyme says to Demon:
i think that whether our Contracts will be valid in courts of law, they should have all the respect possible to those entering into them, if they do, likely they will be used in a courtroom

bella {t} says to Wraith{tyme}:
when dealing with the lifestyle in v/t..... i think it is bad when a Dom uses guilt and harsh words to try to control His submissive.... especially if He resorts to verbal abuse to make her question her self worth... in order to control her...

viscus says to tyme:
nods in agreement

Demon says to Smooth Edge:
Any misunderstanding can be resolve by parties discussing in good faith. And if good faith is absent, the contract won't help anything. I just don't believe in them.

Wraith{tyme} says to bella {t}:
that sounds like abuse to Me

bella {t} says to Neptune:
~laffin~ ok... curls my toes repeatedly...

Demon says to tyme:
No, the jurisprudence indicates they mean nothing. Less than nothing. Sadly, they protect no one, in the legal sense, not the Dom and not the sub.

Demon says to bella {t}:
I agree with Wraith, that sounds like abuse to Me as well.

Smooth Edge says to Demon:
MAybe not in formal contracts but I'm sure You want to know limits in advance and honor hard limits. You tell a sub what is expected and if she agrees You expect her to honor those things. Call it a contract or not, but I think it means something .

Neptune says to bella {t}:
I've never found verbal abuse to have a positive effect under any circumstances

tyme says to Demon:
oops never used in court....

Shikan :
Enters the room...

oncebitten2xshi{Shikan} says to tyme:
well it isnt exclusive to any type of relationship which can be said for most traits mentioned......if i had to name one that is pretty much bdsm related i would say the "because I said so" attitude

viscus :
but as long as the two that go into the contract truly wish to honor it...I believe it is important weather legal or not is a moot point

Shikan :
Greetings, A/all...

BOLT UPRIGHT :
Because we agree this brings both of us pleasure

Smooth Edge :
I wopuld like to diostinguish sarcasm from verbal abuse *grin*

~ashandra~ says to Shikan:
evening Sir

dark muse says to Shikan:
welcome in Sir *s*

Wraith{tyme} says to Demon:
I find My contract with tyme to be useful..not as a legal document since was never intended to be one..yet after 10 years it does help Me to remember what I'm supposed to be doing and expecting from her..*S*

viscus :
not weather oh lord, ...I have lost the ability to spell..puts away my vodka filled chocolates

oncebitten2xshi{Shikan} says to Wraith{tyme}:
that it does

bella {t} says to Wraith{tyme}:
yes... sometimes abuse isn't so obvious when it isn't physical...

Demon says to Smooth Edge:
That's why I take notes, where I can't rely on my memory, which is quite good. *L* Ask bella. *G* Note taking is always a good idea. I just think calling it a contract is awful pompous. Perhaps "agreement" would be a better word.

Smooth Edge says to Shikan:
Evening Shikan

Neptune says to Smooth Edge:
*lol* ok how many nightcaps?

viscus says to Shikan:
Good evening Sir...smiles

Shikan says to ~ashandra~:
Greetings, ashandra... *S*

Shikan says to ~ashandra~:
Greetings, muse... *S*

bella {t} says to Demon:
~smiling~

Demon says to Neptune:
Afreed, whether dealing with a submissive or a subordinate at work or service personel, verbal abuse tends to have little but negative effects.

Wraith{tyme} says to bella {t}:
physical abuse most times heals faster than emothinal abuse..*Nods*

Neptune says to viscus:
candy is dandy but liquer is quicker *L*

Shikan says to Smooth Edge:
Greetings, Smooth Edge...

Smooth Edge says to Neptune:
*holds up two fingers* ....Three

Shikan says to viscus:
Greetings, viscus... *S*

Wraith{tyme} says to Smooth Edge:
typings for wimps..*L*

tyme says to Smooth Edge:
i look at the Contract as manner of honor between the two people, my signature, my word, it means something to me and His word has meaning too, that we both commit to certain intentions and such, means a great deal to those who write them, sign them, pledge to honor the contract

Wraith{tyme} says to Shikan:
Evening Brother

bella {t} says to Neptune:
i agree... there is nothing positive about it..

viscus says to Neptune:
these things are potent...had a Jack Daniels one and it took my breath awa

Demon says to viscus:
Well honouring your agreement, whether called a "contract" or anything else, doesn't that go back to what makes a good or bad Dom? *chuckles*

~ashandra~ says to tyme:
i like the way you describe it

tyme says to Shikan:
evening Sir *s*

bella {t} says to Smooth Edge:
i've taken a lot of verbal abuse over the past few years.. ~soft laff~

tyme says to BOLT UPRIGHT:
that too Sir....*s*

Smooth Edge says to Wraith{tyme}:
and bad doms

Neptune says to bella {t}:
I've always favored guidance over abuse

bella {t} says to Shikan:
good evening Sir ~s~

Smooth Edge says to tyme:
Beautifully said

viscus says to Demon:
blames my repitition on the chocolates...dimpled grin

Shikan says to Wraith{tyme}:
Greetings, Brother...

Demon :
Enters the room...

Smooth Edge says to bella {t}:
Not nearly enough bella..not nearly enough *G*

tyme says to Wraith{tyme}:
and another point, as we age, the memory, well need i say more..... having things in print is good at my age *w*

Neptune says to viscus:
and here I was blaming it on your labido

bella {t} says to Wraith{tyme}:
yes Sir... bruises heal... but the mind and the heart... not always..

Shikan :
*Takes a seat in My chair*

Wraith{tyme} proposes a toast to tyme using the good stuff:
succinct as always Mine..*S*

Shikan says to bella {t}:
Greetings, bella... *S*

viscus says to Neptune:
wiggles in Your lap.."Oh You like that kind of repitition."...waggles brows

Shikan says to oncebitten2xshi{Shik:
Greetings, My shi... *Smiles at you*

bella {t} says to Neptune:
guidance and positive reinforcement are so much better...

Shikan says to tyme:
Greetings, tyme... *S*

gracefulimpling :
Gracefully Enters the room...

bella {t} says to tyme:
very well said ~s~

Neptune says to viscus:
labido is a good thing *s* right up there with intelligence

gracefulimpling :
greetings

bella {t} says to Demon:
welcome back ma Bete ~s~

Wraith{tyme} says to bella {t}:
So..you do not wish to be verbalated..how do you feel about...adjectives ?

tyme says to ~ashandra~:
*winks* thank you love.....just call me awful pompous *w* but i sorta like myself this way *w*

Shikan says to Neptune:
Greetings, Professor...

Smooth Edge says to Neptune:
And samoa girl scout cookies

BOLT UPRIGHT :
as with most things ..if the heart is wrong ..the rest has little importance

oncebitten2xshi{Shikan} says to Shikan:
*raises my head as You make Your way across the room....emerald eyes sparking* good evening Master

Wraith{tyme} says to gracefulimpling:
hello grace

Neptune says to Shikan:
Greetings Shikan

~ashandra~ says to gracefulimpling:
greetings

Demon :
Enters the room...

dark muse says to gracefulimpling:
welcome in *s*

tyme says to Wraith{tyme}:
*hugs* thank You Sir *s*

Neptune says to Smooth Edge:
thin mints!

Demon :
*dusting Myself*

viscus says to Smooth Edge:
thin mints are the bomb...

Shikan says to oncebitten2xshi{Shik:
*Smiles at your attire* I trust you are well this night...

viscus says to Smooth Edge:
mints even

bella {t} says to Wraith{tyme}:
~laffin~ well....

BOLT UPRIGHT says to gracefulimpling:
Welcome to "Legends of Chat" s

Smooth Edge says to Neptune:
We can still be friends...I think.....but you're wrong

gracefulimpling :
Never been here before, apologies

Wraith{tyme} says to viscus:
junior mints are da shit

Neptune says to viscus:
*L* another point of agreement

Smooth Edge :
Next Discussion Night. Samoas or Thin Mints

tyme says to Smooth Edge:
thank You Sir *s*

bella {t} says to Demon:
welcome back again ~helps You dust off~

BOLT UPRIGHT says to gracefulimpling:
Grins ..welcome period s*

Wraith{tyme} says to gracefulimpling:
you're fine,,it's discussion night in the Edge

viscus says to Wraith{tyme}:
yeah that's what they are called am awful with names but those things are amazing.....

Demon says to bella {t}:
Oh you just want to paw Me, perv! *EFG* *sitting back down once dusted, pulling you back onto My lap*

tyme says to Demon:
welcome back *s*

gracefulimpling :
Discussion night? Sounds intriguing.

Smooth Edge says to Demon:
Trouble hanging in the room?

Demon says to tyme:
Thanks lovely.

oncebitten2xshi{Shikan} says to Shikan:
this old thing? *grins cheekily and brushing passioned lips against the back of Your hand* my brain is a bit mushy tonight but otherwise im well .....i hope You are having a lazy Saturday

Smooth Edge says to gracefulimpling:
We do it once a month...on a lifestyle related topic

Demon says to Smooth Edge:
ISP issues. I am considering nuclear retaliation. *BOL*

ethereal_temptress :
Enters the room...

Wraith{tyme} :
and on that note..this discussion is ended...feel free to continue discussing yourselves..*S*

bella {t} :
i think a contract or agreement is up to the D/s couple. some may feel more comfortable having things in writing... so there is no mistake. on the other hand.. things may change with time. life changes.. and changes us with it sometimes. i think it might make for a good foundation.. but i wouldn't think a contract would be something i would like to have

tyme says to bella {t}:
you brought up a good point bella, that is why O/our contract at the request of either of U/us is renegotiated as needed and with our longevity so far, it is necessary from time to time

BOLT UPRIGHT :
Didn't feel too negative about anything that came up….and of course there has to be room for improvement

Wraith{tyme} :
Our next Discussion will be on January 17th @ 9pm Eastern Time. Voce Fittizio will be The Edge Discussion's Guest Moderator and the Topi R/role of Irony - "Why we are all S/switches."

tyme says to gracefulimpling:
welcome but sadly you are a bit late as it is nearly coming to a close *s* 10 eastern time, 3rd Saturday of each, oops most months, you can check the board for updates *s*

BOLT UPRIGHT says to Wraith{tyme}:
Well done s

Demon says to Wraith{tyme}:
Oh thank the room gods! I was already SO behind before I got kicked out. *LMSAO*

Smooth Edge says to Demon:
Excessive.I suggest pouring black coffee on the CPU

tyme says to gracefulimpling:
and check the achives to read past discussions if you like *s*

~ashandra~ says to Wraith{tyme}:
thank You Sir. i enjoyed reading all the post about this discussion. nice to get Oothers thoughts and ideas

ethereal_temptress :
evening

Wraith{tyme} says to BOLT UPRIGHT:
Thank you Bolt

Demon says to Smooth Edge:
Ah but anything worth doing is worth doing to excess. *madman grin*

Smooth Edge says to Wraith{tyme}:
Iconically excellent job

Wraith{tyme} says to ~ashandra~:
thankyou for coming shandy..*S*

(11/15/14 - 23:
21:
45 ) bella {t} says to Demon:
~laffin as You wrap me close~ You can see right through me...

Wraith{tyme} says to Smooth Edge:
Thank you Brother..now I go back in rotation..WOOT!!!...*G*