The following is a transcript of Lesson 1 in the University of Naughty's "Naughty 101" lecture series,
"Laying the Foundation with Presence."
It has been edited for length, clarity, and relevance. Some of the funny moments have been left in, for the sake of evidence that it wasn't as boring as you might think. I've had to break it up, so it will appear as the root post and a few replies.

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: *settles on the stool, picking up the small stack of notes, looking them over with a slow, careful study... then setting them aside* Alright, then, let's get this show on the road.

Osanogokoro
says to everyone:
Naughty 101: The Home of Good Chat

This course has been designed to cover what might seem like established, common-knowledge material. It focuses on and speaks to the perspective of the submissive, though most everything included is universally applicable to both sides of D/s. Lesson 1 is not recommended for veteran chatters, but all are welcome to attend, listen, and participate in the discussion. Feel free to PM with any questions that come to mind, I'll answer in kind, then repost them where appropriate in the open. Being that the online world lacks anything more than loosely-agreed-upon conventions for its etiquette guidelines, the opinions offered by this course are entirely my own, based on my personal experience in chat, BDSM, and the world in general. More experienced participants have the potential to serve as additional help, to broaden everyone's mutual understanding with additional perspectives, so please, if you have something to contribute, PM it to me and I'll work it in where I can.

tyme
says to andrea gail: *scribbles on your back.... taking notes*

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: *smiles a warm, bright smile as pale eyes move from student to student... taking their time, as all three form pictures of elegance, and there's but three, so I've no need to rush... continuing on with the lecture's introduction*
Lesson 1 - Laying the Foundation with Presence

Like any bad simile, good chat is like a house, and its foundation can be summarized in one word- presence. Presence starts the moment you enter a room, even before the first post you write, but is rooted in things done before you even click "Enter." For this reason, let's start with handles, avatars, and entering the room, then move on to a few chat guidelines, and end with a list of basic "dos" and "don'ts."

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: *voice calm, confident, and warm, tone varying as I speak, striving to make rather dry material more interesting for those listening... turning on the stool to face sideways to a convenient blackboard, deft fingers lift a piece of chalk and write a single word...*

- Handles -
*turning back to the group as I read it aloud, I continue*
What's in a name? Everything. Your name is the second thing people notice, after the av. People running with avs turned off see ONLY the name, reducing you to just that one word or phrase. Think about that for a moment.

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: *scrawls another bit on the board...* "Qualities of a Good Name" *reading aloud as I go*
- Propriety - Choosing an appropriate handle for the room is crucial.
"Vampire Lord Count Darkhor" is fine for a vamp r/p room, but might be a bit hard to take seriously in a regular BDSM room.

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: This might seem like something silly to touch on, and it definitely doesn't apply to those gathered here tonight, but as I said before, I want to make sure that we're all starting from the same "Square One." Moving on from the appropriateness of a name, you want to keep it short and simple. *adds another word to the board, beneath "Propriety"
- Succinctness - provide a description, but leave the reader wanting to know more. Would you want to chat with "SteveMWM48DC4RT?"

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: Rather self-explanatory, of course... No one wants a name eleven letters long, it's just silly.

mia {J}
says to Osanogokoro: -shakes her no-

~andrea gail~
says to Osanogokoro: i'd have to ask what it meant....but that's just me...lol

mia {J}
says to Osanogokoro: makes no sense past Steve to this one

Osanogokoro
says to ~lolli~: *pelts you with a chalkboard eraser for being late, then moves on*

~lolli~
says to Osanogokoro: *about chokes on my dinner as the eraser startles me*

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: *nods in agreement* Well, for that example, our friend Steve is a Married White Male, age 48, from Washington, DC. He's looking for, but likely won't find, r/t connections.

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: Another important point is having a name that's as individual as you are. *turns to write a couple more words on the board*

- Memorability/Uniqueness - Being mistaken for someone else is embarrassing for everyone involved. Enough said.

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: Moving on, I couldn't quite figure a good way to phrase this, so... *writes two more words up on the board*
- Brow height - Remember that you're in a chatroom, so if you choose something from mythology, literature, or another moderately obscure source, while it will be a great conversation starter for the one in five hundred who recognizes it, it's depressing when the other 499 have no idea whatsoever. Then again, if you happen to stumble upon one, it can be a great learning experience.
Remember that it's a chatroom, not a collegiate lecture hall. There's a good prevalence towards low-brow antics here, and the knuckles do often drag on the ground.

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: And now, something that might be a bit more controversial... *adds another pair of words, nearing the bottom of the blackboard*

- Staying Power - Once you pick a name, stick with it. You are not a consumer product or corporation. If you find yourself completely lost and alone, hated by the whole world, or on the heels of a particularly nasty breakup, take a break, find a new room, but for heaven's sake, don't pretend to be someone else. The key to a good chat experience is the perception of transparency. For every bridge you burn and enemy you make, remember that this is supposed to be a hobby, something we all do for fun, as an escape. That said, as long as you keep your intentions known, there's nothing wrong with the occasional reboot.

~andrea gail~
says to Osanogokoro: amen!....lol

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: I'm slightly biased where name longevity goes, I've been alphabet soup for twelve years now.

Osanogokoro
says to andrea gail: Glad I'm not the only one on this. Maybe Polonius really wasn't such a bad guy after all, or at least had good advice for his son

~lolli~
says to andrea gail: *wonders how come you get to talk in class, glances at tyme, then slaps my hand over my mouth to cover up my giggles*

~andrea gail~
says to Osanogokoro: not a bad point at all..*S*

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: And last, but not least... *writes one last word*

- Suitability - Make sure it relates to you somehow. This does not have to be a deep, philosophical connection, but it's better to have a name that reflects who you are than to answer the inevitable "So, RopeMaster Bill, are you into bondage?" with "Nah, just thought the name wuz kewl, lol." It's also generally a good idea to Google your name to make sure it's not associated with any psychopathic killers, hate groups, or really bad albums by Barry Manilow or Michael Bolton.

~lolli~
says to Osanogokoro: *chuckles at the RopeMaster Bill comment*

~andrea gail~
says to ~lolli~: ~points to Osan~...tattle tale!

tyme
says to ~lolli~: class related comments okay, geesh you really didn't read any thing i wrote did ya *w*

Osanogokoro
says to ~lolli~: *holds up a second chalkboard eraser* someone's got to be the teacher's pet here... and someone's got to be the scapegoat who gets an F. *wiggles eyebrows*

~andrea gail~
says to Osanogokoro: lol

~andrea gail~
says to ~lolli~: good gosh i hope that makes you the goat...lol

~lolli~
says to andrea gail: *shakes my head* hard limit for me thanks *L*

~andrea gail~
says to everyone: sorry...shhhhhh

~lolli~
says to Osanogokoro: *peeks over at You as I hear the threats, then grins playfully and looks for my special badge* *L*

Osanogokoro
says to ~lolli~: *grumbles* you would boot the instructor...

~lolli~
says to Osanogokoro: Not I, maybe gag for a moment *winks*

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: The main idea here is to think before you choose a name. It's not often we get to name ourselves, after all.

Bottom Line:
You win the lottery/run for public office/cure cancer. Your online private life becomes the the topic of a CNN exclusive. What will your mother/kids/boss think of "wetslut4u269?"

~lolli~
says to Osanogokoro: *LOL*

mia {J}
says to Osanogokoro: yikes.... -laughs-

tyme
says to Osanogokoro: laughs...... hopes *tyme* isn't too bad *l*

~andrea gail~
says to Osanogokoro: You've actually met some of these people haven't You?...lol

Osanogokoro
says to andrea gail: I've been around a few times... seen a few things

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: *looks around to make sure any and all notes have been taken, then clears off the blackboard... leaving it once again tabula rasa, with only the slightest hint of the previous chalk left behind*
Now, moving on... *writes in bold letters at the top of the board*

- Avatars -
This isn't the 80s anymore, avatars are all but a requirement for chat. "A picture is worth a thousand words," so save yourself some typing! They're easy enough to make and/or get/buy/have gifted, no fancy software necessary. Places to store them are also everywhere.

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: As far as avs go, even if you don't feel competent enough with Microsoft Paint to make your own... there are plenty *jerks my head towards the muse sitting over in the corner* of people *jerks it over her way again* who are remarkably talented with images *points at her with one hand* who can, in fact, be sometimes persuaded *waves at her like an Air Traffic Controller* to make an av for someone when the situation warrants it.

‡ dark muse ‡
says to Osanogokoro: *grins from the back of the class*

~lolli~
says to ‡ dark muse ‡: *slips ya a note from beside ya at the back of class*

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: *continues on the topic, winking up to the muse with a smile to answer her grin, then writing a pair of words up below "Avatars"*

Av Philosophy:
- Choose a model/celebrity/person/theme
- Consistency vs. availability - the most beautiful woman in the world makes a great av, but if you can only find one picture of her, you only have one av.
- Coherance is good - if you're blonde in your scripting (not necessarily blonde r/t), don't wear a brunette. Try to find someone who resembles your persona in chat. Honesty is good, but we're all entitled to a little veil of secrecy. People watching your scene don't necessarily need to know about the scar from when your kidney was stolen in Guadalajára.

‡ dark muse ‡
says to ~lolli~: *g*

Osanogokoro
says to ~lolli~: Or, I should mention, the other, larger scar from the lobotomy... Though I must say, it makes a great target for flying chalkboard erasers.

mia {J}
says to Osanogokoro: "scar from when your kidney was stolen in Guadalajára" - girl just dies laughing

~lolli~
says to Osanogokoro: *smiles all sweet and innocent like as I straighten in my seat*

tyme
says to Osanogokoro: grins and giggles at the oh so handsome One *s*

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: While on the topic of choosing a person, a word on self-avs... *waits a moment so mia can come back from the dead... and tosses tyme a soft cloth to clean the brown from her nose*
Self-image-avs can serve a great purpose, adding a human face to the experience, putting a modicum of truth and perspective to the room, as well as showing a level of comfort and confidence uncommon to people who seek social interaction through the virtual safe-haven of the Internets. However, they can also be a major buzzkill for those engrossed in the fantasy elements of the room. Additionally, using a picture of the "real you" at a recognizable landmark local to the general area of the planet/continent/country in which you live is known can pave the way for obsession, stalkers, and other badness (i.e. don't wear a picture of you in Times Square if no one knows you actually live in Manhattan). Tread carefully, and imagine the face of your best friend if the two of you were out walking one day and someone you've never seen before approached you, exlaiming "Sexybunny35? Is that you? It's me, RopeMaster Bill!"

~lolli~
says to tyme: *points at you and giggles*

tyme
says to Osanogokoro: grumbles........ shining my A in asskissing class *s*

~lolli~
says to Osanogokoro: woohooo RopeMaster Bill again *swoons*

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: *makes a valliant effort to ignore the confection's antics... then nails her right in the lobotomy scar with an eraser... writing a bit more on the board*

Image choosing factors:
- Nine times out of ten, tasteful wins.
- Who are you trying to attract? Remember that men, especially Doms, are most often one-track minded idiots, whereas women are a complete mystery to men, so you're on your own there. Classy, tasteful avs will draw the attention of classy, tasteful people, and vice versa.
- It's good to have multiple avs from which to choose one to suit your mood, mindset, etc. Don't wear the av of the girl tied up if you're not in the mood to have some classless wonder ask and/or try to tie you up, and for the sake of all sense, don't wear an av of a girl getting fucked if you aren't looking to get fucked that night.
- Same shirt syndrome - picking a subject who's too popular might result in there being more than one Brad Pitt in the room. Not as if that has ever happened. Ever.

~lolli~
says to Osanogokoro: *mutters obscenities, then picks up the eraser and sits on it, glancing around noticing they are all under my butt now*

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: you know, I can just see "RopeMaster Bill" appearing in the room sometime... and lolli not being able to keep her hands off of him

tyme
says to Osanogokoro: grins at Brad *s*

mia {J}
says to Osanogokoro: -frowns at the girl tied up av this one is wearing, whisering- no body tie this one up please

~andrea gail~
says to mia {J}: lol

mia {J}
says to ~lolli~: -slides you the eraser she fund on the floor to sit on too.. whispering- one less for Professor's ammo

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: All pretty much common sense... And yes, we all have different preferences... More hardcore places require more hardcore images... some Dominants also prefer (or require) their subs to wear more... interesting... avatars... Or, maybe you're in the mood to parade about as the girl getting fucked on the hood of a Chevy by seventeen Mexican farm workers... Who am I to tell you otherwise? It's just a general set of guidelines... no edicts here. And for the subs whose Dom/mes force them to wear such scandalous attire as a garage gangbang, E/everyone understands that when a collar wraps around your neck, certain compromises are made. Dressing in such a manner is a testament to your devotion to the One who dressed you.

~lolli~
says to mia {J}: *mouths thank you as I snatch it, wink*

Osanogokoro
says to mia {J}: *nods once* that's actually a very valid point... Avatars also need to be taken as a whole picture... yes, the girl's tied up, but immediately above her is the big, unmistakeable "His." I don't think anyone's going to miss that, lovely

~andrea gail~
says to tyme: aren't you supposed to be posting the thingy when people come in?...lol

mia {J}
says to Osanogokoro: -nods quiet like and breahtes a littl sigh of relief- good to know.. girl wasn't in the mood to be tied up at the moment -smiles-

Osanogokoro
says to andrea gail: It's on the main page.... that should be enough, I think...

tyme
says to andrea gail: where's an eraser when i need it... *g* ...in their PM so i don't interrupt *w*

~andrea gail~
says to tyme: ~soooo glad for lolli~....lol

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: *continues, adding a word to the slate*

Tags:
- Name
- Collar/Partner's Name (depending on relationship)
- Short witicism, quote, mantra, etc. (keep it simple)

~lolli~
says to tyme: *guards my erasers from lil miss brown nose*

tyme
says to andrea gail: our teacher has a lot of faith in humankind *l*

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: When designing an av with tags on it, remember that it's a small space, and small spaces get busy really fast. Besides that, how can we see the pretty person if there's a whole bunch of words in the way?

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: And last but not least, the single most overlooked avatar element in the world... *writing it in big, bold letters*

Mouseovers/ Alt Tags:
- YES! All you have to do is add a simple bit of code to your av html! {img src=http://imageaddress.jpg alt="Insert mouseover here, in quotes"}
- Quote, description, song lyric, collar, general indication of mood or frame of mind.
- Limit yourself to 15-20 words absolute maximum.

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: Sometimes it's easier to throw on an av and put your message of devotion to the O/one on Y/your collar in your mouseover. Not as obvious, yes, but let's hope that my faith in chatterkind isn't misplaced.

~andrea gail~
says to everyone: ~counts my mo~...lol

~andrea gail~
says to Osanogokoro: hell....counts YOUR mo....lol

~lolli~
says to andrea gail: *checks which one I have* *L*

tyme
says to andrea gail: nudges you

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: *can't see anyone's mouseover at the moment, is running with image links on instead of full avs to prevent lag*

~andrea gail~
says to tyme: whattttttt?

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: Call it a pet project of mine... I heart mouseovers.

~andrea gail~
says to Osanogokoro: she's poking me!..~points to tyme~

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: Bottom Line:

The combination of your handle and av should tell the idiot who just walked in everything you want him to know before he PMs you.

mia {J}
says to everyone: -tries to think of a good mo-

~casia~
says to Osanogokoro: ~chuckles at that remark~

~lolli~
says to tyme: *starts to reach under me for an eraser when I hear ~andi~ in distress*

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: *waits for the note-takers, then clears the board again... starting over with a new title*

- Entry -
*turns back to the group and speaks* Ok, so you've set yourself up with a good name, a killer av, you're set to go, right? Not quite. There are two optional but important things to do first.

Osanogokoro
says to ~lolli~: *starts obviously petting a brick sitting on my desk... roughly eraser size and shaped... but so much more effective*

tyme
says to Osanogokoro: scribbles fast trying to get all this down *s*

tyme
says to ~lolli~: *sticks my tongue out at ya*........just saying *g*

~lolli~
says to tyme: *sticks my tongue out at you as I show you the mini recorder I have in my pocket*

tyme
says to ~lolli~: lotta tongues in here *s*

~casia~
says to everyone: ~sits on the good girl pile of blankets far far away from tyme and lolli~

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: Optional but Important Thing One: Know where you're going!
Read the entry page all the way through. If there are room rules, read them, learn them, know them! Take notice of any av restrictions (350 pixels tall is pretty normal), gender biases (men/women only), themes (bdsm, r/p, straight chat), and make a mental note to yourself. If there are announcements, upcoming events, or a link to a forum, make a mental note! You'll also get an idea of the etiquette standards for things like C/capitalization and PMing. This is the room's metaphorical sign on the door, and it just might say something as pertinent as "Biohazard Warning: All Personnel Must Wear Protective Gear at All Times." These are adult gathering places, so certain things are universal and common sense (i.e. no kiddie porn), but ignorance of a room's rules is never an excuse for breaking them.

tyme
says to Osanogokoro: 3 cheers for that lesson Sir ....

Osanogokoro
says to tyme: It's the whole faith in chatterkind thing... If you write it, they will read it. We hope. If it's interesting.

tyme
says to Osanogokoro: bless You !

~casia~
says to Osanogokoro: really?....hmmmm....T/they will always read it, Sir?

~casia~
says to andrea gail: ~giggles~

tyme
says to ~casia~: grabs you as soon as i see you didn't raise your hand *g* bad girl pile *w*

~casia~
says to tyme: eeepppsss......~mutters as i'm grab and just sighs~....fine fine, i'll stop pretending....~snuggling~

mia {J}
says to everyone: -notices she is the only one left in the good girl row and smiles bright-

~andrea gail~
says to mia {J}: we will have to tell Your One....*S*

mia {J}
says to andrea gail: -smiles a soft smile and nods-

Osanogokoro
says to ~casia~: My point is that we should all read it... set something of an example, perhaps... If someone else embarrasses themselves, it's not our problem, right?

~casia~
says to Osanogokoro: ~chuckles softly~.....i embarrass myself all the time, Sir....~nods~....it's part of my charm

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: Optional but Important Thing Two: Check your codes!
Find an empty room that doesn't have a clearly posted policy against it, head in, and check that everything works! Hit an HTML-savvy friend on messenger to verify everything, or just head into the room and take your chances. It's up to you, just remember, the first impression that the potential love of your life is that opening line, and there's not too many things unsexier than the red "x" of a broken av. Taking the five minutes to go into a room and cycle through your avs before you use them the first time can spare that three-to-five seconds of awkwardness where you run to config, trying to figure out what the problem is. Broken avs are an example of a problem dying for a solution marketed on late-night informercials by an exhuberantly overexcited, obviously gay man and his self-styled "auntie" who speaks with an accent of dubious Australian descent. Someone get on that.

~lolli~
says to Osanogokoro: *throws my arm up in the air, wiggling my fingers*

Osanogokoro
says to ~lolli~: Question, confection?

~lolli~
says to Osanogokoro: None of this find an empty room at Sizzling stuff, that's a no-no, we do provide an avi testing room, the Avi Auction House, when not in use that is it's purpose *S*

~andrea gail~
says to Osanogokoro: ~runs up to the desk....opens my jacket very quickly...flashing You with all my glorious assets~

~andrea gail~
says to ~lolli~: ~holds this pose...looks over my shoulder~...hellooooooooo!

~lolli~
says to Osanogokoro: *runs up behind ~andi~ as Your temporarily distracted, gathers up ALL the erasers and bricks and takes to the back of class for safekeeping by me*

Osanogokoro
says to andrea gail: Come on, did you bring enough to share with the rest of the class? *crosses my arms*

~andrea gail~
says to Osanogokoro: ~closes my jacket...slinks back to the back with lolli~..... sighs...

tyme
says to ‡ dark muse ‡: too quiet..... knows you are being naughty.... just knows it, i can feel it in my bones.

Osanogokoro
says to ~casia~: I'll not argue your habits regarding self-embarrassment... I'm too busy being raided and flashed.

~casia~
says to Osanogokoro: ~laffs~

~lolli~
says to Osanogokoro: Yes, we should all read it, but respect that most rooms on this site people are paying for, hence, respect that and use a room for testing that is there for that purpose.

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: *clears my throat above the cacaphony and quickly fills the board with the rest of this part...*

Rule #1 - Enter the room first!
"Enters the room" is a perfectly acceptable way to enter the room. Getting in the door lets you see who's there and what's going on before you make a spectacle of yourself.

Rule #2 - Never copy and paste!
Unless you have a library of greetings on file written on some rainy day when your internet was out that covers every possible situation you might come across when coming into a completely unknown infinite, write something fresh. You might come into a room one day and find two subs enjoying each other, and the next day walk into a no-holds-barred naked mudwrestling tournament (hey, I can dream). The point is, tailor your first actual post to each situation. More on that in later lessons.

Rule #3 - Acknowledge E/everyone who acknowledges you!
This is critical. If someone says something to you, respond. It doesn't have to be a five-line soliloquy of beauty and grace, but at least give half a line's worth of "Good evening to you as well, thank you for the welcome." It might be awkward for you to speak to someone of the gender into whose pants you're not trying to get, especially when you're typing one-handed, but for the sake of common courtesy, swallow your respsective hormone for five seconds.

Rule #4 - Never interrupt a scene in progress!
If fate is smiling upon you and you walk in on a scene in progress, your entry post should include a part where you notice the scene in progress (preferably saying something both specific and positive about it), silently acknowledge everyone, and retreat to the shadows/sidelines to watch, saving your greetings for later. Don't upstage what's going on, either- keep it short, simple, and relatively undecorated.

tyme
says to ~lolli~: i emailed the lot this morning love *w*

~casia~
says to Osanogokoro: ~absolutely loves You've addressed the scene n progress thing~

~lolli~
says to tyme: Thank you *S*

~andrea gail~
says to ~casia~: *nods*....and story night too....it's hard to read a story when Eeveryone is talking at the same time

~casia~
says to andrea gail: ~nods nods~....gawds yes it is

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: *nodding to casia's approval* Never interrupting a scene in progress is a common courtesy thing that, unfortunately, gets missed by a lot of people, especially newer chatters. It's just plain rude. And dumb.

~lolli~
says to everyone: *slides further up the good girl list*

~andrea gail~
says to ~lolli~: ~pulls you back down to the gutter with me~...lol

~casia~
says to andrea gail: lol

~lolli~
says to andrea gail: *grins and tumbles*

tyme
says to Osanogokoro: You will have to join us on erotic story night sometime Sir..... whispers

Osanogokoro
says to tyme: you know I will.

~casia~
says to Osanogokoro: worse is when the scene gets rude comments.....~shakes my head~

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: Bottom Line:

Open your eyes, come in, and remember that no one there can read your mind.

tyme
says to Osanogokoro: raises my hand

~lolli~
says to ~casia~: *bites my tongue*

~casia~
says to ~lolli~: ~whispers~....you wouldn't do that would you?

~lolli~
says to ~casia~: *eyes widen as I shake my head back and forth*

~casia~
says to ~lolli~: ~thinks i'd get beat or worse for it, nods and nods~

tyme
says to andrea gail: ok i will do it this time *g*

Senoj says to everyone: greetings friends

~casia~
says to Osanogokoro: ~raises a lil hand as well~

Osanogokoro
says to tyme: *pauses a moment* Yes, lovely?

~lolli~
says to ~casia~: *whispers very quietly* I've had it done to me, not once, but several times by the same person. *rme's*

Osanogokoro
says to ~casia~: Go ahead... multidirectional conversation is a hallmark of the chatroom experience.

~andrea gail~
says to ~lolli~: some people have no couth...*nods*....

~lolli~
says to andrea gail: No, they don't, no manners either.

~casia~
says to ~lolli~: ~whispers~....i've never done it......it takes a lot of courage to being scening in the open to begin with, good or bad, gotta respect O/one that does it anyway

~lolli~
says to ~casia~: I agree *soft smile*

~casia~
says to Osanogokoro: well, ummmm......about making an entrance, Sir.....~tilts her head curiously~.....i used to bang out a specific entrance to my mood everytime i entered a room (Gorean training) until a few years back when it became something P/people quit appreciating, do You still recommend doing it now?.......i mean, M/most just don't notice, Sir

mia {J}
says to ~casia~: this one used to do that too... for same reasons, Gorean training... was told not necessary in D/s rooms

tyme
says to Osanogokoro: Sir, i have a personal preference to allow convos to proceed , as long as no one greets the sceners, or makes a comment on the scene, but myself, when i was scening, preferred the chatter around me, rather than the silence, now a collaring.... i would always enforce silence but the couple

~lolli~
says to tyme: I'm the same way, hence the lack of a pm in KKS from when it was a busier place.

~casia~
says to tyme: ~nods~....i've lived through it both ways.......i don't mind the chatter as long as someone is not trying to draw my attention from where it should be.....~nods~

Osanogokoro
says to ~casia~: *nodding* That's a good question... I, for one, always believe in the undeniable truth that comes in a good, quality post. Maybe I'm overphilosophising, but damn the audience. If no one appreciates your awesomeness, maybe it's time to find a new room... That, or the people who do appreciate it... me, for one... just need to step up and mention it.

~casia~
says to Osanogokoro: ~nods softly and considers that~....honestly, i miss the entry posts, Sir.......just don't do them, cause they seem to be almost frowned upon

~casia~
says to everyone: ~'cept when a certain One is here Who always appreciates them~

tyme
says to ~casia~: nods and agrees, no convo, greeting or otherwise to the participants *s*

Osanogokoro
says to tyme: Individual preferences are certainly to be respected... And while we can't expect everyone to know them... Regulars should, and can definitely take people who don't know aside to school them one way or another... My main thrust was not to interrupt a scene in progress with an elaborate entrance post

CanadianMale
says to everyone: smiles and considers all the advice given

~lolli~
says to tyme: Sometimes comment to the participants is okay, or at least to the Dom/me.

Osanogokoro
says to ~casia~: If you miss entry posts, go for it... That Polonius guy again... Goddess bless Alicia Silverstone.

tyme
says to ~lolli~: and some Dom/me's encourage it *s*

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: Now then, moving on...
*gives a moment for the stenographers... then clears the board again... starting fresh, with the last actual topic...* We're getting nearly done with this ordeal... one topic, then the dos and don'ts... then we can all have coffee.

- Chat -
This is where it all happens. You've made a good first impression, now it's time to keep the attention of the attractive/interesting man/woman you've just met. What do you do? How do you do it?

~casia~
says to ~lolli~: i always try to save those for when the scene is over...........but i have been known to post a few times during the scene as to watching, maybe catching my breath at something, or squirming......something to just let the participants know i appreciate them sharing

~lolli~
says to tyme: I know *W*

Osanogokoro
says to ~casia~: *nods* I was actually just getting to that

Senoj
says to tyme: For me it depends on the scene. If its one of my more playful moods, interuptions don't bother me. However if I am being serious, which should be obvious from my style of posting, then interuptions are a bother. Nevertheless, my close friends are always welcome to address me in PM no matter what I am doing

~casia~
says to Osanogokoro: ~giggles and quiets, listening~

mia {J}
says to everyone: -speaks quietly- as one whose Owner prefers public scening, it never bothers this one when chatter is occurring about Tthem... however, it is when te chatter is about the scene... good or bad.. that is distracting.. or if Ssomeone is trying to greet this girl while scening, she feels terrible cause she canot return the greeting until afte the scene is over.. she feels like she has hurt Ppeople's feelings after

tyme
says to Senoj: that's true, people need to read the mood before posting and some just don't even look

~casia~
says to mia {J}: ~nods and nods at that, has felt the same~

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: *resumes with the lesson* We'll have time for discussion once class is over, I promise... I definitely appreciate the interests and comments and ideas. *writes a new pair of words on the board, then starts in on a good list of things*

Posting Guidelines - How to boast the best post:
- Visually differentiate between speech and action. It doesn't matter how, but be consistent. Wrap actions in *asterisks*, -dashes-, or ~other symbols~, italicise, make speech boldface, Hell, put it in quotes, but do SOMETHING to delineate. It's very hard to follow otherwise.
- When you chat in open post, other people may read what you're saying, even if you don't read what they're saying to people other than you. In r/t, your conversation could very well be overheard, and it's even easier for this to happen online. It also serves you to keep a general idea of the conversations going on around you, in case someone directs a comment or question your way or leaves an opening for a pithy interjection (which can be awesome or rude).
- Correct typos that change the meaning of what you're saying, but don't fret over little ones. We're all human, and none of us have a paid typing staff. If your typing is that bad, either buy yourself some voice-to-text dictation software, train a monkey, or practice!

‡ dark muse ‡
says to mia {J}: you shouldn't mia.....E/everyone should understand that you wouldn't be allowed to greet or speak to Tthem while in a scene.

mia {J}
says to ‡ dark muse ‡: nods- she frets though that Tthey do not.. but thank you.. will try to remember that

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: *moves on to the second group of Posting Guidelines*

- Punctuation is not critical. This is especially true if you want to make your speech read more like natural spoken word, but commas and elipses are your friends. Use them to accentuate, add dramatic pauses, and maintain the general flow of your posts.
- Experiment with different styles, with the aim of developing your own. This will happen over time anyway, even without any particular effort. Every now and then, change it around a bit. Don't be afraid to slightly copycat the scripting form of one you admire, but give credit where credit is due.
- There are twenty-six letters in the English alphabet. Always use all of them. Few things in this world that are as completely un-sexy as "hi, ur hot. R u busy?" From where I stand, chat standards such as common abbreviations for smiles and laughs are fine, but don't use them when you're trying to impress someone.
- If you don't feel like you can keep up with other chatters, just keep practicing.While it's possible that certain chatters came out of the womb with keyboard in hand, no one was born with the ability to type 120 words per minute. Except me.

‡ dark muse ‡
says to everyone: *smiles softly and hushes*

~andrea gail~
says to Osanogokoro: flashing works.....sometimes...lol

Osanogokoro
says to andrea gail: *nods* I'll have to keep that in mind next time the group gets distracted

~lolli~
says to everyone: *wonders what to do to distract the group and make Professor O flash*

~casia~
says to ~lolli~: ~giggles~

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: I didn't say I'd flash, confection... but thank you for volunteering... *continues*

- If you want to build your vocabulary, read. Read what? Anything you can find. Analyze the scenes you admire, pick out the words you find particularly captivating and write them down somewhere.
- If you want to get better, practice. Good chat does have a learning curve, and it's natural to get frustrated. Remember that some chatters have been here for a decade or longer, and they weren't always as good as you think they are. Except me. Also remember that anyone who claims to need no improvement isn't worth the conversation. Except me. Try your hand at writing a story or two, then maybe an erotic story. Saturday nights are a perfect venue for putting them on display to solicit feedback from the community at large. I'm hardly the sole authority on what it means to write good script.

- A rule of thumb for post size-
If it's more than five lines, split it up into more than one post. Keep your thoughts to a paragraph at a time, or else it will take too long for you to type and too long for the receiver to read. That said, feel free to post more than once in an exchange. You can much more easily achieve the balance between detail and readability if you provide visual breaks in between, and keeping the size down will allow much greater interaction.

mia {J}
says to ~lolli~: -whispers- this one could do something to try to get over to the naughty girl pile

~lolli~
says to mia {J}: *chuckles, but remains being a good quiet girl* *L*

Senoj
says to Osanogokoro: A comment on your guidelines since you mention smileys. If you are critiqueing somene or something, or are making a post that can have its meaning easily misconstrued, adding a smiley or ~grins~ can soften the coment and/or guide them to the meaning you wanted.

~casia~
says to Senoj: ~nods nods nods~...emoting is sooooooo important, Sir....~nods more~

Osanogokoro
says to Senoj: *nods* Exactly... I was exempting the common smile abbreviations, such as "ss" and "bs" and "vbs." I've never found emoticons to be appropriate for a bdsm chatroom, though

Senoj
says to ~casia~: ~LOL... emotes my butt into my comfy chair~

~casia~
says to Senoj: ~giggles~

~lolli~
says to everyone:

~casia~
says to Osanogokoro: but sometimes, O/one can tell A/another's mood by T/them switching to that , Sir........sometimes it's a sign that A/another is tired or distracted

Senoj
says to Osanogokoro: now that you mention it, I can't remember the last time I saw someone type out a :-)

~casia~
says to Osanogokoro:
~quiets and listens cuz imma jabber box~

Osanogokoro
says to ~casia~: *nodding* Very valid point as well... When we aren't feeling impressive, or don't have the time to be impressive... not being impressive is an excellent way to show it

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: And the next bunch of suggestions centers on in-room behavior... not that anyone here needs to learn anything on that.

Behavior Guidelines - What to do when you're new:
- Ask questions. It's a chatroom, for cryin' out loud! Chat! Ask about room history, upcoming events, the owners, other VIPs, find out who people are and in what their interests are. Basic details like where you're from, what the weather's like there, all golden.
- Ask more questions. Find out anything you need to clarify about room rules, anything that isn't listed, and the more subtle things like expected sub behavior, C/captializations, public scenes, etc. Most of this can be learned by observation on a busy night, but when in doubt, ask!

Osanogokoro
says to everyone:
- Don't lurk. Note, this are suggestions for what to do when you're new, not when you're muse. Sitting silently in the shadows, just watching the room is fine if and only if you periodically (twice an hour or so) post that you're doing something to that effect. Even when a scene is going on, it's more than appropriate to make a short, to-the-point post expressing interest in what's going on around you. Keep in mind that people in chat only know you by what you write. If you don't write, they don't know you. It's okay to be a little shy, but only if you work it into your approach. Adding the word "shyly" makes a glance alluring, especially if it's focused on a particular individual. Silence is not alluring, and cyber-moping will not make you feel better. In fact, it usually makes things worse. If you're not in a particularly sociable mood and putting yourself in a social situation isn't going to make it better for you, don't put yourself in a social situation!
- Greet and welcome newcomers, even if you're a guest yourself. This is the quickest, easiest way to get yourself into a conversation with someone, and it just makes people feel good. Almost every chatter's biggest pet peeve is walking into a room to complete dearth of acknowledgement. It's not just tacky and cliquish, it's downright rude. That said, when it happens to you (notice I said "when," not "if"), put on your big girl panties and deal. The "leave" button is right there.

mia {J}
says to everyone: as a fairly new chatter to this room, this one has never experienced that here.. is a very unique experience and proves to give an overwhelming feeling of welcome

Osanogokoro
says to mia {J}: *smiles warm* it's part of what makes this room this room... and the KKS too, I might add... very, very friendly over there at the confection's place.

~lolli~
says to Osanogokoro: *smiling warmly* thank You

~lolli~
says to Osanogokoro: *eyes widen*

Osanogokoro
says to ~lolli~: Question, confection?

~lolli~
says to Osanogokoro: *shakes my head* nope, I'm just sneaky, not a lurker by Your definition *L*

tyme
says to ‡ dark muse ‡: grins

‡ dark muse ‡
says to tyme: i don't lurk ....*l*

tyme
says to ‡ dark muse ‡: course you don't *snickers*

Osanogokoro
says to ‡ dark muse ‡: *nodding* we all know you don't lurk, you always poke your head out and let people know you're there... heck, you can be downright social

~casia~
says to Osanogokoro: ~grinz at the big girl panties~

~lolli~
says to everyone: *pulls my skirt down*

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: *nods and continues...*

- Don't be afraid of the squelch. If somenoe's bothering you, squelch! Don't just ignore, don't whine about it, just squelch. Make a comedic show of dragging out of your PM any unwelcome scallawag who snuck in to say something indecent, dropping him or her plainly and simply in the middle of the floor before promptly squelching. Accomplishing this before he or she has the opportunity to deride anyone but his or her own dignity is an added bonus.
- Respect any and all collars you see! This is another one that falls under the "ask questions" category. If you aren't sure about someone's status, ask! I've made this mistake a few times, my apologies offered to a certain ill-mannered Boy and his lovely girl. A girl might've taken up her usual, demarquated place at a certain Dom/me's feet ten posts before you walked in and not have made any allusion to it since, and though especially possessive girls might get bent out of shape by someone asking if "their Dom/me" needs anything, someone's bound to get irritated if you march right up and kneel down on top a girl who's already there. In fact, it's easiest to just ask before you approach A/anyone, unless someone indicates otherwise. Some people don't mind having contradictory simultaneous conversations (i.e. when a Dom is sitting with a girl in his lap and yet still hugs people who just came through the door), but others are really strict about observing the laws of physics.

~lolli~
says to Osanogokoro: *stands up clapping*

~andrea gail~
says to Osanogokoro: i prefer the pull them out and stomp their face myself but....well....tyme won't let me anymore....*s*

Osanogokoro
says to andrea gail: she just doesn't want all those months of anger management therapy you had back in the Joint go to waste

‡ dark muse ‡
says to tyme: i don't snicker either ....*raising my chin up a bit* ...*l*

Osanogokoro
says to ~lolli~: Like I said... the basics, commonsense stuff, so we're all on the same page. *winks*

~lolli~
says to Osanogokoro: I'm very pro-squelch *smiles*

~casia~
says to ~lolli~: prefers ignore, but will on occassion squelchy

~lolli~
says to ~casia~: squelch is a great defender of drama *nods*

phaedra
says to everyone: *wanders in and waves with a dimpley grin* evenin A/all....*saunters to Daddy's chair, climbing in and curlin up with my blankie*

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: *moves on*
- When the time comes and you do perform a scene/serve, take your time! Free up a sizeable portion of day/evening/night in which you can be completely undistracted by r/t, and consider working out a basic outline for yourself. For example, drink service involves nine basic steps- order taking, traveling to, fetching ingredients, creating the beverage, basic cleanup, returning with the creation, approaching the Dom/me, serving the refreshment, and dismissal. A sub trying to impress someone can turn that into a minimum of 18 4-line posts. More on this sort of thing in later lessons.
- After your scene, solicit feedback! Ask other subs, ask Dominants (preferably in PM, so as not to put them on the spot in open post), ask anyone who was there, let them know you're looking for constructive comments and any suggestions. This will help you learn individual preferences while preparing you to approach Dom/mes in a manner unrelated to the sexual element of D/s. Dominants are people too.

tyme
says to Osanogokoro: all terrific lessons for everyone Sir, thank You

phaedra
says to andrea gail: *grins as i curl up to listen* evenin lovely....is this naughty school?

~casia~
says to ~lolli~: ~nods~....ignore works much the same way love

~casia~
says to Osanogokoro: fantastic lessons, Sir......E/everyone should review them....~nods~

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: Getting down closer to the end, now... *continues*
- People come for all manner of reasons, but don't expect an honest answer to that question. Suffice to say, we're all here to enjoy ourselves, one way or another. Remember that the door is too low for high horses to fit, and you are expected to know where you're going before you go there, no one forced you to click "enter."
- Don't divide your attention. If you want to chat with everybody in open post, do it. If you want to cyber in PM, do it. Don't try to do both at the same time, 99% of people consider it as rude as answering the phone during sex r/t. It's also a bad idea to be deep in conversation/cyber/scening via messenger while chatting in a room.
- Be patient, and be sure to appreciate patience in others. Rooms lag, stall, and sometimes freeze. Anyone who's ever spent more than five minutes in a certain chat site that rhymes with "metropolis" is surely familiar with this concept.

warm woman says to everyone: ooops have to check the salmon

~andrea gail~
says to phaedra: it is..welcome...*S*

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: Actually, let me restate that one, because it's something I've been very guilty of in the past... a few times. maybe once. crap. Still...

Don't divide your attention!

phaedra
says to Osanogokoro: *giggles and pays attention*

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: Ever!

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: Well, maybe not ever... it's alright to be multi-conversating... as long as you're not in the shadows with someone, or on msn with someone... or both.

~casia~
says to Osanogokoro: ~giggles~....i think W/we have A/all been guilty of it at some point, Sir.....as You said, E/everyone is human.....~winks~....'cept You

Osanogokoro
says to ~casia~: *puts my halo back in its proper place and polishes it up* damn right

‡ dark muse ‡
says to Osanogokoro: that might explain why some are quiet sometimes ...*s*

Osanogokoro
says to ‡ dark muse ‡: Why, muse, I never knew...

~casia~
says to ‡ dark muse ‡: oh oh oh ....tell tell tell.....~grinz~

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: *keeps going before I get distracted by the idea of muse in the shadows*

- Communicate. Use your manners, if you have to go, go, but if you're leaving someone hanging, apologize and make it up to him or her later. We all understand that r/t comes first, but no one should have to forgive you for frequently disappearing with no explanation. That's bad chat karma, and it will come back to bite you, probably when you meet the single awesomest person you've ever met, who lives two towns over and likes Bob Marley as much as you do. You will be booted, your computer will start belching noxious clouds of vomit-green smoke, your power will go out, Martians will invade, Al Gore will demand that you bake a cheesecake in tribute for his invention of the Internet, former Senator Ted Stevens (R, AK) will clog up the series of tubes in the least pleasant way imaginable, and you will never see the awesome person again.

- And, last but not least, everyone gets booted! This means that it's not the end of the world, and anyone worth the conversation will wait the minute or two it takes to get back into the room, so take a breath. That said, since everyone gets booted, feel free to make witty comments about it when it happens to you or someone else. BBB, Booted Bum Balm, and the application and dispersal thereof are all registered trademarks of Osanogokoro Industries, Inc, copyright 1997. For a free sample, send a self-addressed, stamped envelope to the address at the bottom of your screen.

~andrea gail~ says to Osanogokoro: ~blinks~

~andrea gail~
says to Osanogokoro: what if you have a really short attention span and they type really slow?....lol

~andrea gail~
says to ~casia~: He's done that too...*ducks*...lol

Osanogokoro
says to andrea gail: Who are you again?

~andrea gail~
says to Osanogokoro: no one You would remember

~lolli~
says to andrea gail: *LMAO*

Senoj
says to Osanogokoro: another good point is if you are in a scene, or the target of a serve, respond to each post so there is no question that the person expending effort on you has your attention

~casia~
says to andrea gail: ~giggles and wonders if it's rude to play solitaire while cybering~

~andrea gail~
says to ~casia~: apparently as long as it's secret...nope...lol

~casia~
says to andrea gail: ~giggles~.......well, don't go tattling on me

Osanogokoro
says to Senoj: A very good point

~lolli~
says to ~casia~: *laughing*

~casia~
says to Senoj: ohhhh...good point, Sir.....there is nothing worse than putting out 8-10 3-5 line posts serving a drink to get one simple......"beautiful serve, girl, thank you"......~mutters~

phaedra
says to Senoj: *nodsnods* an excellent point Sir....positive reinforcement is important

‡ dark muse ‡
says to ~casia~: i'll pinch you later ...*evil grin*

~casia~
says to ‡ dark muse ‡: ~giggles and licks your cheek~....promise?

‡ dark muse ‡
says to ~casia~: laughs..

warm woman says to everyone: back -- yeah I'm guilty of wanting it to flow more quickly -- I'd rather have many shorter posts than fewer loooooooooooong posts

Asterix says to Osanogokoro: Sounds like good ideas from what I see ... not unlike manners r/t

tyme
says to Osanogokoro: Sir, are You finished with the lessons for tonight?

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: I apologize for mostly focusing these lessons on the perspective of the submissive... serve appreciation is definitely critical, as far as Dom/mes go... Might have to work something up for that Audience as well, assuming any of their egos are sufficiently smaller than mine to allow learning. probably be more of a roundtable. I'll leave that to Wraith. He's got the street cred.

Osanogokoro
says to tyme: Not quite...

Osanogokoro
says to everyone:
Bottom Line:

Have a good time, but don't be an idiot!

tyme
says to Osanogokoro: laughs about Wraith *l*

~casia~
says to Osanogokoro: ~chuckles softly~

~andrea gail~
says to Osanogokoro: Good job Osan...*S*

Senoj
says to Osanogokoro: If they ain't willing to learn, they ain't a real Dom/me

tyme
says to Senoj: wonderful point Sir *s* thank You *s*

Asterix says to Senoj: Good point ...

~casia~
says to Osanogokoro: was that the last, Sir?.....~curious look~

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: Last but not least, here are a few simple, basic Dos and Don'ts, for your summarizing pleasure.

*pulls down a screen and flips on an overhead projector so I neither have to read this out loud nor write every blasted word on the blackboard....*

- Basic Dos and Don'ts -

DO:

• Be friendly

• Be patient!

• Greet E/everyone who enters upon entry, unless you're busy

• Ask questions

• Use all of your letters!

• Show respect for fellow chatters, with or without capital letters, and with or without class

• Squelch when necessary

• Enjoy the mystery, both your own and others'

• Enjoy the fantasy, both your own and others'

• Say goodbye before you leave

• Believe in chat karma

• Relax and have a good time!

DON'T:

• Put up with people who disrespect you

• Mess with other subs' Dom/mes without permission

• Mess with other Dom/mes' subs without permission

• Divide your attention between scenes taking place in PM and conversation in open post, or vice versa

• Splitscreen between two rooms without telling people that's what you're doing

• Work away from the room without ghosting

• Forget that there are people on the other side of the screen, and some of them are assholes

• Ditch the room

• Forgo your r/t life

• Lurk

• Take it all too seriously!

phaedra
says to Osanogokoro: *giggles at Use all of your letters* i absolutely hate it when people type..ur and u to me

Osanogokoro
says to everyone: And the final lesson post for the night.... the one that opens the floor to dicussion, as if the chaos that started a few minutes ago hadn't happened...

- Conclusion -
The foundations of your house of chat are prettymuch simple common sense, including simple rules on handles, avatars, entry, and chat, plus the quick list of dos and don'ts. At this point, I want to open up the floor to any questions, comments, and discussion, including the questions that were asked during the lecture. For our next session, Lesson 2, "Serves and Scenes," which will take place next Thursday, 15 January 2009, starting at 8:00 p.m. Eastern Standard Time, by the room's timestamp. Be there or be square, because it's going to be a lot more interesting!